CurlyNikki, "White Girls Have It Hard Too" - The Backlash After Featuring A White Natural - For Long, Healthy Natural Kinky and Curly Hair

CurlyNikki, "White Girls Have It Hard Too" - The Backlash After Featuring A White Natural

3/7/2014

WaterLily716 - Featured on CurlyNikki

CurlyNikki recently received a huge backlash after featuring a white woman on the site. This is my perspective; I am going to try to be as balanced as possible:

Firstly, I am going to step away from race, completely: I feel sorry that WaterLily716 had to contend with so much hate because clearly she does see herself as struggling with curls. However, one of the issues I thought came through in her profile was that she's not struggling to gain wider, community acceptance as many type 4s do, but more accepting herself.

Indeed, I have to admit that I don't think the struggle with type 3A hair is even close to that of 4A/4B/4C hair. These are my reasons:

Very loose curls don't get matted. WaterLily716 might not even know what matting is. She may tie her hair back when she goes to bed but even if it were loose she would not find her hair completely stuck against her scalp - that is the type 4 struggle.
Can type 3A really get as dry as 4C hair? I very much doubt that. Daily spritzing isn't even an option for 4C girls but I am sure it is for WaterLily716. I personally have to spritz to help product spread further and to soften my hair. Very loose curl types don't need the constant moisture to maintain soft hair.
Her hair is normal in the work place. If she rocked into work with her curls it would be completely normal. She has self-confidence issues about not having straight hair but putting all that aside no one would bat an eye at her hair. Type 4s especially have to cope with a lot of negativity at work. People seriously don't understand our hair and think it is either unkempt or an attempt to make a political statement. In a recent email a fan even told me that her boss offered to pay for her relaxer! Say, what? That brings me to my next point:
Can you even relax loosely curled type 3A hair? Her roots look straight to me.

These are the questions I have. In all fairness she does admit that the questions on the CurlyNikki application form didn't all apply to her. This could be seen as the first signal that her struggles were different to the target audience.

To me, the whole natural hair community is not only about embracing yourself as you are but about showing hair types that were almost completely extinct at the turn of the century.

Many of the tips we share with each other are completely useless to those with very loose curls because they simply don't face the same issues.

RACISM vs. DISCRIMINATION vs. NICHE AUDIENCES

RACE: I believe racism is wrong whether it is white on black, black on white or even black on black. We simply should not judge people by skin color because it has no impact on character or intelligence even if crazy research might suggest there is a connection.

DISCRIMINATION: I also believe discrimination is wrong. Darker skinned blacks vs. lighter skin blacks remains an issue both in Africa and in the West. Kinkier hair types get much fewer picture likes than looser curl types on natural hair pages - ask anyone who runs a page.

NICHE: However, I think focusing on a niche is completely fine. Every business or blog has a target audience. For example:

Business forums for women target women because there are unique issues they try to solve for them that they feel men don't face. Are they discriminating against men? I don't think so; I myself have gone out to find women's networking groups because I want to connect with fellow entrepreneurial women more.
A shoe business can focus exclusively on heeled shoes and not design flats - are they discriminating against flat shoes? Okay, I recognize here we're talking products rather than people but the concept of focusing on a niche still applies.

Anyhow, as an information site CurlyNikki has traditionally focused on 3C down to 4C hair and that is what people have come to expect. Some people return to her site, time and time again because they really want to see type kinkier and curlier hair types. A business needs to be consistent and the backlash shows that Ms. Nikki Walton did something inconsistent and unexpected.

This could just be a change in business strategy for the site so those that don't like it will walk to the multitude of other sites available and those that are still getting the content they want will stay. It's that simple.

I have nothing against any race; I myself am married to a white man. I would love to see white people with type 4A/B/C on our natural hair portals because their struggle will be exactly the same: they will know all about matting and the daily spritz.

At the end of the day, this wasn't a race issue to me, it was a hair type issue. I saw CurlyNikki's site as focused on a certain hair type, more specifically kinky & curly hair types that were hardly seen at the turn of the century. What she did was post a hair type that never disappeared from public view and as such it did not really fit the imprint of the usual CurlyNikki profile.

Okay - comments please. Am I being unfair or even unbalanced? What is your perspective?

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heather

1/7/2014 07:07:36 am

You should have seen the comments. Most of the backlash was racial

Heather Katsonga-Woodward

1/7/2014 02:39:36 pm

That is a real shame because the focus should have been the differing hair issues...

Cara

1/7/2014 10:36:32 am

I don't think you are being unfair in your opinion of the post but if someone said that you were being slightly hypocritical I could understand that. You said, "As an information site CurlyNikki should have thought about why people return to her site, time and time again; they really want to see type 4 hair (with a little 3C) - she obviously did not think about her end users. A business needs to be consistent and the backlash shows that Ms. Nikki Walton did something inconsistent and unexpected." I say I could understand because there was a period of time when on your Facebook page you were posting about breastfeeding with your page being entitled "Natural Hair Growth by Neno Natural." People probably did not follow your page to read about breastfeeding or see pictures of breastfeeding that they may or may not agree with. I happened to see some of the backlash that you received and there were comments from others that I found offensive on that topic as well (especially those who are not American but had so many negative things to say about Americans having never been there). I say all of that to say this: though everyone is entitled to their own opinion be careful that you are not doing the same thing that you may dislike or disagree with when you see someone else do it.

Your post here was very respectful and very tasteful though. I like how you did not attack her for doing something different and that you sympathized with both those who were offended and those who were unbothered. This was also very well thought out and I hope that I have not offended you by my comment.

1/7/2014 02:38:28 pm

That is a totally fair comment.

I would however mention that in the "about" section on the Facebook page I describe the page as being about natural hair, me and things that interest black women.

My page is definitely mostly about hair but one of my goals is for it to run like a person page not a business page.

This also why 95% of inboxes get a reply. People are writing to a person and in fact now that I have posted stuff about my pregnancy people are sending messages about how they feel encouraged coz they also have PCOS.

Anyhow, long story short before I post I ask, "will this interest black women" because I have no shame in admitting this is my target audience.

1/7/2014 02:46:36 pm

Ps. The breast feeding images (three posts in one day) were in my top 10 most viral posts that month so I can safely conclude that whether people were for or against public feeding they were VERY interested by the topic 😃😘 and it agreed with the page imprint.

hillz

1/7/2014 08:03:41 pm

I think most of the times its race and not hair type. I have come across soo many hair blogs/forums that have African Americans posting 3A or 3A/b hair photos looking for help with their hair and nobody said anything negative, they just gave suggestions, now its someone who isn't African American and they throw stuff on her face. I hate to say this but most blacks have big problems with whites.

You see a white with a Fro and people talk bad but you see black girls with strait hair extensions or weaves, relaxers and nothing bad goes to them..?

There are a lot of bloggers with very loose curls following advises that most 4' haired use. I seriously don't see anything wrong with what she did. Maybe if it was a type 1, I would be like ????

Its race, not hair and not even business.

2/7/2014 03:08:28 pm

Thanks for your view. I guess on a certain level my understanding of race dynamics in America is always as an outsider looking in. Having been brought up in Africa and never having been taught anything about the slave trade at school (the British curriculum does not teach it at all) I feel I am frequently a step behind in my understanding of the real feelings. I wish you could explain a little more about why you think blacks hate whites. Especially as many whites today are completely accepting of us as the same.

H x

2/7/2014 07:37:23 pm

I'm a Kenyan, and I'm just as outside the box as you are.

I made that statement because I noticed it in so many occasion. Most Blacks make whites a threat to their lives. I know that there was slavery and many people suffered a great loss but seriously this is not the generation that was enslaved(at least not the majority), I think its time the Afri-Ameri stop running to their past to justify their future.I don't have a problem with whites, my boyfriend is white and I am pure black. Its not only in America, its happening here in Africa even though there is a wider acceptance from the whites these days than in the past.
Maybe things will change the moment people realize that whites are not the only racists, we black are also racists. We live in a society where when a white offends a black its racism but when a black offends a white its defense..?????

Just a question for you,
Under normal circumstances, if I see you and you see me but I frown at you, what facial expression would you return?

3/7/2014 05:13:12 pm

I would look at you quizzically and be like, do we know each other? Why do you ask?

3/7/2014 06:42:30 pm

That's how most people look at each other whether it comes to race or hair. Am just glad I haven't come across any of your posts that makes you split people completely because of hair types.

keep it up!

Curlie

28/7/2014 11:20:07 pm

If black people wanna keep digging in the past: the american slavery might have been 100% harsh and 0% our fault but have we forgotten our evil black "brothers" who captured our sisters and sold them to the egyptians *insert ancient folks* etc...?? I think we should just move on and enjoy life instead! We are the new generation and are not opressed anymore.

And I also 100% agree with your content. Her hair is almost straight..in my opinion she has 2c hair.

yayapreacher

2/7/2014 09:52:01 am

I do not think that this statement was appropriate. We are alienating other people just because they do not have the same type of hair we do. I have 4a type hair and I feel your blog response is very unprofessional and... other races have other hair types but it is still curly and some people don't get that all we "all" want to do is wear our hair in its natural or most close to natural state. I've been natural for 13 years... the struggle is still the same. They alienate us, we alienate them... Never ending story. God created us in His image. I have to see my brother and sister like I see myself and like I see God. Peace out.

PS: I'm unsubscribing

2/7/2014 03:10:20 pm

I think you need to re-read your post.

Other than that I respect other opinions even those that are different so I wish you well in you natural hair journey.

Heather 😘

2/7/2014 03:17:10 pm

Apologies I meant reread MY post.

Rayne Gauthier

2/7/2014 01:42:23 pm

I can't exactly say you're wrong. You're not really. Especially about them having different needs than us. But why was it so wrong to feature her? To her, she is having trouble. It might not be the level of difficulty that WE have to deal with but it is difficult for her. And you said that CurlyNikki wasn't thinking of her end users or something like that and maybe she wasn't. But that doesn't make it a bad business decision. Maybe she is secure in her followers (I know I personally will keep going to her site for the info that pertains to me just like I love to come here as well) and thought it would be cool to feature the other end of the spectrum for a change. Or that it would be great to reach out to the other women in the world. We are being guilty of the same thing we hate. Segregation. I personally know loadssss of white girls with curly (for them) hair who have literally no clue what to do and how to take care of it. And while their hair type never disappeared from public view as you put it, that doesn't mean that everyone knows everything there is to know about it. And there might be even mixed girls with that hair type. Who knows? Maybe CurlyNikki thought it would be a good way to expand her follower base and to get information to those girls who haven't found it yet. And most importantly of all it IS her little slice of internet and people shouldn't blast her about what she chooses to do with it. Especially when she so faithfully keeps on top of caring for their needs. Just because she featured that girl doesn't mean she is suddenly pro white people or pro loose curls or whatever or that she will suddenly stop catering to HER kind or whatever else people have to say about it. It was a thing that she decided to do, maybe she will continue, who cares? Read it as an interesting change or don't. Skip it. Go right to what you're looking for. Nobody is forcing anybody to look lol. She has A LOT of cool stuff on that site. Enough for everyone. Why can't she share her talents? I know we want to have our super special stuff but if we don't like it when people do it to us, why do we then still do it to others?

Your utterly respectful and loyal subscriber,
Rayne/Hafsa

p.s your site rocks and is that thing for your books on Kindle still available? Please say it is sooooo and I didnt miss it.

2/7/2014 03:13:59 pm

I think your view is more balanced than mine! I might make a blog post out of it if that suits you.

Thanks for explaining your thoughts ever so eloquently.

H x

2/7/2014 03:15:42 pm

By the way, I greatly appreciate your subscription. You are exactly the reason I wrote blogs, books and make videos even when I am utterly exhausted.

Much love
Heather

2/7/2014 11:36:15 pm

Oh that would be totally awesome! And thank you! That means a lot!

Tequila Johnson

7/7/2014 06:15:22 am

Heather, I do think your comment was fair and I also agree with you when you said Rayne's view is a little more balanced. Well said!! It shouldn't matter what race you are or what hair type you possess. Everyone has their struggle. And we should be patting Nikki on the back for her hard work. This just goes to show how much Nikki's site has grown. It contains so much helpful information that it has reached other cultures, ethnicities, etc. This lady felt so confident in the information that Nikki shares that she knew she would be able to get help with her situation. I think it's a great thing that she is able to reach out and help others. I see lots of white people that rock afros or have afro textured hair. It feels good to know that the struggle is not only ours but theirs as well. They too might want to reach out to sites and people like Nikki but are afraid that they might receive the same backlash demonstrated here. We talk about uniting, overcoming racism, building/upholding one another - what better way to do it than through our natural hair community. As we see, talking about natural hair leads us from one thing to another. What better way to work towards ending segregation and racism than being accepting of other races and cultures that share our struggle. I know we felt special, but let's face it - we ain't THAT special!

Roxy Murphy

3/7/2014 12:55:44 am

I am a Black woman with 3A/3B hair and enjoyed this feature very much because it was a hair type I can relate to. My mixed son is a 2B shoulder length hair type and if his hair isn't oiled and pulled back while he sleeps he wakes up with a huge matted spot in the back that takes 10 minutes to carefully detangle. I have to moistutize on a daily basis even when my hair is done in a style that doesn't require re-wetting or I end up with dry brittle ends. I may not understand ALL that struggles of a 4 hair type, but I know there are things I can relate to since my sister has that hair type and we frequently share tips or products. We might use them in different ways, but at the end of the day hair is hair and we all struggle sometimes no matter how "good" our hair type. The grass isn't always greener and there were times growing up that I envied my sister's coarser hair much like she did mine.. I don't feel it was bad business for Nikki to feature this woman. There's always a lesson to be learned and people are free to skim over post they don't feel pertain to them. The women who responded negatively and made this woman feel like she had no reason to complain or had no struggles just don't understand because they've never been in her position. I hope there are more post featuring different hair types and different ethnicities in the future. Curls come in all shapes and sizes. And we all have some sort of battle with them.

3/7/2014 01:21:21 am

I must add that after reading this woman's post responding to the backlash that I relate more to her hair in ways than I do other Black women. If I were to fill out the questionaire that Nikki it would read similarly. I've been natural my entire life. I've never done a big chop or transitioned. My parents are both black, but in my great-grandparents generation on my mom's side we have Irish and Blackfoot Indian. I started out as a 2B/C and once I hit puberty I literally wokeup one morning a 3A/3B. My mom swore it was because I put gel in my hair instead of grease and no one in my family understood me because I was the only one like this. I get backlash in the Black natural community that I don't share the struggle and don't deserve a voice. Nikki's blog isn't exclusively for Black natural hair. It's just natural hair in general and women in the 3 range should be included.

3/7/2014 04:19:00 am

Very interesting view point.

You are completely right, most if not all discrimination comes from not understanding. Because I write every post on Neno Natural I could never write specifically about 3A or 3B hair because I have no idea what the struggle is. However, someone with 3A or 3B hair such as yourself can read something I wrote and think, "ah, that applies to me too". Nowadays I use the terms kinky and curly rather than numbers and letters because I think it caters better.

The first time one of my straight haired (white) friends told me she had dry hair I was actually shocked because I didn't know straight hair ever had dryness as an issue.

CurlyNikki is based on guest bloggers so I think she is in a much better position to pursue a strategy of targeting the whole hair spectrum. Similarly, if I wanted to write about looser curls specifically I would work with a guest blogger because I wouldn't have a clue what issues to talk about.

In my head, I think type 4 has x issues and other types have totally different issues. In reality, this could just be in my head!

What the backlash has brought to light which I didn't think about before is that kinky and curly haired people are connecting on race as well as hair...

kia

3/7/2014 05:00:12 am

it was all cool until a few black women on twitter was trying to tell her why she couldn't really say her natural hair definition didn't even come close to our (black/mixed) definition. it got hostile when she made a smart remark. that's when all hell broke loose. it wasn't about race until she said it was "curly nikki and not black nikki" as soon as she said that i no longer felt bad for her.

Quisha

3/7/2014 06:43:16 am

I don't think you are being unfair. Some blacks have said that they like that we have our own space to discuss hair. I am sorry but white people's hair is different at the end of the day. I really didn't care that Nikki featured her. I thought it was strange because I feel black people and white people are different. I am sure WaterLily716 will never have some one call her hair nappy or unkempt so she will never understand our struggle. I am African American and blacks that grew up in America even though our generation didn't grow up in the slave era; the struggles that our grandparents went through still haunt them and they have carried those tragedies over to the younger generation. Blacks in America still have to worry about racism because it is alive and well here.

3/7/2014 11:24:43 pm

I don't think there's anything wrong with a little diversity. if she revamps her entire site and delete the past threads then I will be upset. this was just a window into a different perspective.

Charletta Bullard

9/7/2014 12:30:04 pm

I think you have really explained what I think CurlyNikki was going for but somehow things went down hill rather quickly. I don't think race should have been a factor or hair typing discrimination is necessary. I think the woman was looking to the natural hair community for guidance. I am very compassionate towards the woman but at the same time I feel that the interview was not conducted in a rather thought out way. My son is biracial and his hair is much kinkier than mines. I found that so hard to believe but it's the truth and I often wonder where did his hair texture come from. I have a combination of 3c/4a/4b and I think he is 4b/4c. Mostly on the 4c side. He loves wearing his kinks and curls in a fro and I love that he embraces his hair type. He is only 13. Through him I have learned to love and embrace what I was born with and I think that is what the woman was searching for.

Danielle

10/7/2014 03:07:33 pm

I came across your blog through a post about jojoba oil. I really liked the post, found it very informative, so I continued to look around. I'm white, I have loose curls. I came to your blog through the google search engine (which didn't inform me that I wasn't a part of your target audience). I don't know what number or letter my hair is. All I know is that it is curly, it gets matted, it is really dry and hard to brush through. When I read your this post it made me so sad. I think it is a race issue. If it would have been a black girl with that type of hair there probably wouldn't have been a backlash. I visit the blog heyfranhey all the time because she is smart, she is funny and she has amazing hair information that has helped me so much. I don't care about the color of her skin. She is an awesome blogger. I really wish it didn't matter.

11/7/2014 11:52:01 am

I agree. It should not be about race. We find more and more ways to cause division. It's' just not that serious! I'm going to visit heyfranhey. She may have some tips that are helpful to me (black girl 4a hair).

11/7/2014 11:52:15 am

12/7/2014 05:18:47 am

I think you are right. Some comments I read seemed to really focus on race. I hope one day we all get over skin color. I hope that day is in my lifetime. I love having a very mixed family. Actually, I say that but we're missing someone of Asian-origin.

You know what I mean.

I definitely wish I understood curly white hair more. My white family all have bone-straight hair.

Cathy

23/7/2014 08:53:13 am

My problem with the whole 'controversy' was it's a thin line between "white girls don't belong here" to "biracial girls don't belong here because they never felt x,y,z" when there are plenty of biracial girls who identify as black with hair just like the white girl in question. Are we going to start arguing over who's black enough?

That's the trouble with the internet, people can't just decide something doesn't apply to them and move on, they feel like they have to post angry youtube rants and it just escalates.

Youraveragenaturalhahahalol

26/7/2014 01:34:59 pm

To respond to your fair responses in a respectful way..(PLEASE READ ALL ;))

Very loose curls don't get matted--I feel like the MAJORITIY of black people who write/claim stuff like this, have never even felt/touched a white person's hair, but is judging based on the lucks...I have felt and even tried to braid a number of white people's hair, and even the straightest of hair was so tangled to the point I didn't want to braid any more....It depends on each person. Some white people may look like they have the silkiest, smoothest hair on the outer layer, but when you really begin to work with it, that stuff is a hot mess...! Especially, with curly hair...To the point that if it's so thick, and curly it can break a brush...So yes white people's hair CAN and Does indeed get matted.

Can type 3A really get as dry as 4C hair? I agree with your opinion on it...but isn't that the same as 4a hair to 4c...can 3c/4a hair really ever get as dry as 4c hair...? Eh..I don't think so. It can get really dry, but not as much as 4c. And even for those with 4c hair, that may not always be a fact. I know a person with 4b/4c type hair, and she told me her hair is always unusually soft.

Her hair is normal in the work place--Have you ever seen a white person with curly, twa type hair?? I seen a child recently who was white and had afro type hair. She wasn't mixed or anything, and you can still see hints of a curl pattern. The short the curly hair, the more of an afro it looks, and probably then employees might think that their hair is 'unacceptable' for the work place. Afro-type hair might seem unruly to those not used to it, especially when it's short, and naturals 'experiment' with all different sorts of hairstyles. And even depending on the job, if a white person's hair was all over the place looking like a hot mess, I doubt that would be considered inappropriate...And that boss is HELLA rude, like what on earth??!

And finally, can you even relax loosely curled type 3A hair?--Lol...that sounds kind of ignorant in my opinion, not to be rude. it's one thing if you said 2A, but you said 3A...lol... YES it can!! And many times it is. I know a friend whose younger sister, aged 13 (?), and asian, who got a relaxer! Her hair was only curled, and perfectly, at the end..her sister envied the curl, but she relaxed it!! Now that is crazy.

I'm not trying to be rude, but I know their struggle is not our struggle and all...but that doesn't mean they don't face a struggle. Whenever people with 3c hair or even 4a to 4a/4b hair complain about their hair I literally role my eyes cause what do they know about the struggle when you have 4c hair...But then it's funny because those with 3c/4a type hair do exactly the same with looser type-hairs....And like someone commented, if it's okay to feature those with biracial hair, then it should be okay to feature white people with similar type hair...We don't need white people taking over the natural hair community, but featured once in a while should not cause such a huge debate!!!

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CurlyNikki, "White Girls Have It Hard Too" - The Backlash After Featuring A White Natural

By Heather Katsonga-Woodward

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